after-snipes

I'm beginning to suspect that, despite my best intentions to the contrary, I'm becoming a *grumpy*old*man*.

Never wanted to be one, I see them on the road all the time, shoulders up around their ears, scowling. See them in the stores acting disappointed that I stopped and let them have right-of-way in the aisle/parking lot/whatever and dashed their expectation of me.

No, I was going to be the easy-going, smiling, relaxed, world-by-the-ass senior you associate with gracefully aging movie stars (think Robert whats-his-name that was a charming jewel thief in a tv series in the early '70s and now is the occasional Tony DiNozo's dad on NCIS).

But when I caught myself thinking there ought to be a name for the shit you say after you hang up the phone or under your breath walking away from a conversation, I had to own up to a bit of g.o.m.-ness. They usually aren't nice, either. Here are a few of mine:

"Shut up Bob" - to the radio, 92.5 "the river" afternoon dj, talking after a song
"and hurry the @#$ up" - my manager to me after he tells me what he wants
"Bitch!" - me to all sorts of people, male/female/indeterminate/imaginary

You get the idea. At least, if you have any snipe in you, you do. If you can't relate at all, congratulations. I want to grow up to be just like you [bitch].